Types of Offense
Events that include other people have the most opportunity to produce offense. The closer you are to another person, the more opportunity there is for friction. Friction has great potential to provoke offense.
As ironic as it may seem, you can become most offended because of events that include people you trust, care about, and love or of whom you have high expectations—those with whom you have some kind of relationship. A teacher or a boss may be people whom you neither love nor trust. But, because they have authority over you, you do have high expectations of them.
The other day I spoke with a friend who works to stay current. What I mean by "stay current" is forgive quickly when issues arise or offense comes. It is easy to let things build up, but if you stay current you deal with it as it comes.
She brought an issue up to her husband and normally this would result in yelling, heated emotions, the opposite of what she wanted: resolution and peace. However, this time, she had forgiven everything before going to speak to him and it went smoothly, better than expected.
A study was conducted recently around cultural values and forgiveness. We found it especially interesting since the cornerstone of the Christian walk, and much of what our classes focus on, is forgiveness.
The study asked people to identify their religious preferences and how much they valued forgiveness; the results are remarkable.
“Honor is not flattery, nor is it the building up of people where there is no substance. It is walking in truth, honestly pointing out the righteous truth about others...with no exaggeration and no demeaning.”—Arthur Burk
Honor Pays Attention
From a Christian perspective, honor recognizes who another is in Christ and acknowledges what is seen, usually verbally, to that person and others. Honor is recognizing and speaking the truth about the honorable things another does and says, their good works and wisdom, their good character traits, natural abilities, spiritual gifts, the fruit of the spirit they exhibit in their lives, how what they’ve done and said has blessed other people, their anointing, the fruit of their ministry, how they have grown, how important they are to the body of Christ, etc.
Honor is different than speaking prophetically into another’s life or even blessing someone. Both prophesy and blessing are very important. They are about God’s intentions for a person’s future.
Author: Valerie Bixler
Valerie's life mission is to know God and make him known. She and her husband minister in Colorado Springs.
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